Golden Years: Re-Entering the Dating Pool as a Senior
There is an old saying that goes, “love is a beautiful thing.” While this is a lovely sentiment, this life path is not always easy for some. You might be astonished at how being single has become the new normal even in some retirement communities in New Jersey.
Most seniors are comfortable being single and don’t feel the pressure to remarry. For most, their fear of bouncing back into the dating game is wholly based on the impossibility of never finding love at that age. However, we are here to prove you wrong and let you know that it’s possible to find your love again as a senior if you do these things.
1 Know What You Want
If you feel the pressure to get into a relationship to take away the loneliness, chances are you’ll make the same mistake over and over again. Most seniors, however, through the years, know what they want and what to avoid. Though some life constants don’t change when you’re dating, it’s important to first reflect on your past relationships and figure out what made them not work and what you would do differently.
At this point, you can’t only settle for beauty but make personality a priority. If you focus on character, chances are, you’re going to attract the right person this time around. It’s also essential to have someone with whom you share the same interests and with whom you can enjoy doing fun stuff together. This way, if you happen to meet someone with a different personality from your priority list, you will disengage yourself from the earliest possible before it gets too deep.
1 Try Online Dating
These days, you never know where you could stumble upon the love of your life. It can be in the parking lot, through a family friend, at work, etc. We have heard a lot of successful love stories which originated from the internet. Therefore, it’s important not to assume such platforms, which have currently had many success stories. Luckily, there are a lot of safe dating sites which you can try out without fear.
If you’re shy in person, this platform can help boost your self-confidence, especially if you upload your best pictures from time to time. You will get one person who compliments you differently from the rest. With time you get someone online, you can build trust and conversation online then eventually organize for a physical meetup.
2 Get Involved in Social Community Events
As we always say, being in the right places at the right time will save you a lot of time and hustle. Since not everyone can fit into the online dating world, community participation is another excellent platform that helps you mingle with other seniors one on one.
Here, you will most likely get someone who shares your interests in; art, fitness, gardening, etc. It also gives you the chance to advance these meetings and keep the communication over dates or calls as you get to know more about one another. It would be great to have someone in your senior life with whom you share most of your interests in the long run.
3 Don’t Feel Rushed and Don’t Play Games
Most times, seniors no longer have the pressure to do stuff in the stereotypical way that society has set. So, be sincere with yourself and your partner to hold those exclusive conversations like your deal breakers, financial standing, sex life, or how long they can keep up with the relationship. It’s not a bad idea to rush into it anyway because at this point, as a senior, you already know what you want, but there is no need to risk it.
4 Don’t Ignore Your Immediate Family
A lot of times, adults do things on their own selfishly without thinking about their kids. In most cases, children end up in conflict with the person who will later be introduced into their lives as “mom” or “dad.” If, by any chance, you lost your spouse, it would be a great idea to give time to your children to heal so that it can be easier for them to support you as you date someone else.
It is always good to reassure your kids that the person you’re dating is not trying to replace their mum or dad. These conversations are never easy, but they will save you from lots of baggage and conflict in the future. Equally, make sure that the person you want to date has held this tough conversation with their children. It makes the whole process easier. However, always remember that you must also have set boundaries with your children or grandchildren. Your happiness comes first, and only you can make the tough decisions for yourself.
Bouncing back to the dating life can be challenging, but the thought and view of an old couple that has rekindled their love life give hope to the young generation. I hope this guide will rekindle your dating spark and enthusiasm to get back into dating life again.
About the Author
Jennifer Bell is a freelance writer, blogger, dog-enthusiast, and avid beachgoer operating out of Southern New Jersey.